Who we really are and what we really want II

… Remember when I said I was going to be discovering me, and promptly advised that you do same? It appears I have made a few more discoveries, and of course I’m going to share! I must reiterate along with Tony Robbins however that “Knowing is not enough! You must take action.” Anyway, back to me…

Dear InnerMe,

I am a fighter; every fibre of my being is born of resilience, I bounce back and out of every challenge that comes my way; like the eagle, I understand that the storm is my only propeller to heights others can only dream of, into world’s I can only imagine, into ventures that only the brave will risk and thus only the exceptional can attain. According to Napoleon Hill, “Victory is always possible for the person who refuses to stop fighting”. Makes sense, don’t it? So, rise above my fears and fight I must! Yes, indeed I am born of a true Nigerian spirit in the very resilient sense!

I am a thinker; I just will not be limited, even by the limitations that are clear as day, I simply will not acknowledge them. Call me a joker if you like, a dreamer, a loose cannon, but if I can dream it, then surely I can be it! Yes, I can push myself like that!!  It’s hard with all the distractions, but I always try to know more about anything and everything that’s relevant in the emerging world which I am a part of. Surely and steadily, I try as a matter of necessity to avoid the danger, limitation and imprisonment of a single story!

I am a dreamer; I bet you are wondering how big a difference that is from thinking, but I assure you, I dream it before I can even begin to think and wrap my head around it!! Yes, building castles in the air and the whole shebang!! Dreaming makes me want it badly enough that I will be more than inclined to think it through over and over and over and over again. Then, I have to do it; true to Tonny Robbins’ words, “the path to success is to take massive,determined action”. I can’t act if I haven’t thought, and definitely can’t think if I haven’t dreamt. My dreams and values push me beyond my comfort zone and drive me even when no one is looking!

I am a firm believer of Ralph Waldo Emerson’s words, “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us”, and I totally live and abide by this as best and as frequently as I possibly can; Spiritually, professionally, financially, and politically. Believe in and desire a change so badly that it physically hurts, and be ready to make plans and take actions in the directions of your yearnings, and the sky will be your starting point. Aggrieve a people continuously and steadily, and you will undoubtedly feel the strength of their wrath and the effect of their hate. I can go on and on about what lies within and how effective it is in shaping our world in our preferred direction, but I’ll let your mind do the rest… We all need to believe in something, there simply has to be a picture bigger than us!

As I am sure is probably clear to you now, I am a discoverer; I like to discover stuff as I have embarked on this task of discovering me!

Thanks for letting me into a little more of me, and following through on my determination to be a better me.

Yours always and truly,


This may seem rather mundane, pedantic and somewhat unhelpful, but the best way to define who it is you are is to focus on the specifics of your true self and do an actual discovery of every part of you as is seen in your reactions to every part of your life.  

It appears I know who I am and thus my first phase of discovery is complete; liken this exercise to writing your life goals and long-term plans in a place where you can constantly see them and remind yourself what it is you live for. It doesn’t make them happen, but it keeps you ever focused on their realisation and channels you towards them with every thought, plan and action.

Nothing is as powerful as a picturesque of where it is you are headed, discover you and then discover that!!

Who we really are and what we really want!

Interestingly, we get to a point in our lives where we generally feel like we have it all figured out, the thing is maybe sometimes we genuinely sort of do! However, we run into our greatest tests when we realise that there’s almost no purpose behind our actions… that can be totally demeaning!

Of course I know what I’m doing, of course I know what I want, I totally repeat it to myself even though I don’t have to so obviously I can’t have missed it, can I? The thing is I do miss it… so many times I’ll lose count if I am true to myself about how many times I really go back and begin the planning process again. How many times I get what it seems I wanted and yet it has no value, and I wonder why I thought I needed that very thing in the first place!

>>> I sometimes wonder if I truly know what I want, and then I stop short and slam an affirmative Yes! Of Course I do

>>>I want a job! Of course, I do. What kind? O_o

>>> I want to be happy? Of course I do! How? With who? Doing what?

We totally lose our focus on focusing on our specifics, it’s not enough to want a job, or wish happiness on ourselves; Ok, so we think we know what we want; if we’ve never considered the how or the why synchronizing with the what, we surely are no closer to finding fulfillment in our lives, it just means nothing, nothing but worry about what we don’t have and wishful yearning for those things. We have to tell ourselves specifically as it is…. I’m going to serially discover myself by telling me how I am, and I suggest you do same!!

Dear InnerMe,

I am a me with dreams of one day reaching out to the world, I know I like to make a difference; I yearn to speak and be heard, and recognized for what it is I say. I want my words to be able to bring value, solace and motivation to people I will never meet or have the opportunity to shake their hands… Yes, I recognize that words can do this! That is my strategy, expose my words to places I may never see; people whose heritages I may never understand. My words will go places and speak volumes on my behalf!!

I am a planner, tell me about yourself and I will give you a plan to take you to your next phase, but I have a problem; with my own plans, I fear taking that first step of execution; I am afraid it seems, afraid I may fail, I think I’ll rather hide behind the comfort of having never tried than to expose myself to the possibility of the pain and disappointment that failure brings. You know what, for the purpose of gratification, I dare say my problem is half solved, I know it’s there so I can speak to myself until I can push me off my irritable fears and man ventures after my dreams!

I am not a romantic, don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of love, and watch the movies and read books wishing I could feel the way they seem to feel, but it’s never quite worked out that way.

You would think I should be because my best place in the world is by the ocean looking up to a star filled midnight sky, hearing the sound of the waters beating against the stony embankments, and the slushing sound of the water’s retreat against the shore sands. Sitting on a bridge or hill and watching the orange sun set against distant waters. I wish I can look into my mate’s eyes and have tears in my eyes just knowing that he loves me so, I wish I could get lost in the feeling of love and being loved so much so that nothing else in the world matters!… I sound like a romantic, don’t I?… Still, I won’t ooh and ahh over a bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates (I’m more likely to do so for chocolates though J), or a solemn declaration of love; as much as it’s a good feeling, it won’t matter if he didn’t open the car door for me; though he has to somehow be nice and sweet! Yep, I’m sure you figured that with relationships, I can sometimes be an enigma even unto myself, seems like I want what I don’t want!

…Moving on!

So, I’m going to continue writing my attributes to me until I identify with how they influence me and make me the better me I’d rather be, and #innerme you have to help out and meet me half way!

Yours always and truly,


What then is the difference between you and I? That I have nothing to fear or that I own up to the existence of a fear that I intend to overcome! … Own up to your fears, look into your eyes, and tell yourself who you are, of your weaknesses and your strengths, brace up to them and they will surely make you a better you!!!


Sink or Swim

The best laid plans, the brightest “light-bulb” ideas, the well thought of strategies, the most harmonized visions, and even the soundest objectives. All of these remain absolutely latent if they remain in your head! In a matter of clarity, they mean absolutely nothing!!

It’s not going to count for anything if you knew the answer and said nothing, in fact if you know and do nothing you’re worse than the completely ignorant. “I heard that in life the best thing to do is the right thing, the next best is the wrong thing, and the worst is to do nothing”… It’s really that simple!

To whom am I writing? You know yourselves, but yes, I am talking to us: The Nigerian youths, we who are ambitious for an unclear dream, have an almost undeserving desire to be wealthy, who say our Government has failed us, there are no jobs and you absolutely have to know someone to get in somewhere regardless of how insignificant the job is, have to pay inexpensive and unimaginable prices for opportunities that should be our birth rights… Yes we who complain all too clearly about what we don’t have but truly don’t know nor understand what we want beyond the material. We who yet are unwilling ourselves to do something.

A quick question I bet never crossed your minds, what are you supposed to do after all? It’s their responsibility to sort you out. Well, pardon my arrogance, but I will ask all the same because it’s a question as legitimate and as timely as they come; what have you done for yourself?  How have you helped in your smallest social unit, your family? What is your impact in your country? Yes, our nation owes us a whole lot, but we equally are duty bound to it and owe it much!

Think for a second… A country with rich resources, but someone has to harness them. In other words, the country won’t fix itself, a country is  a place divided by boundaries, a nation is what is developed by a people! Truth be told, our country can’t do anything for us by itself, other than re-create what we have done for it!!! If you see it this way you will understand that there’s a world of things truly within your control

Following this attempt to overcome social and governmental entrapment within our minds. I reckon we will each get to a point where we have to make a decision as to what we are going to do with and for ourselves, where we go beyond expectations and look within, where we go beyond wishful thinking and even thoughts of hope, a place where we have got to act. Many clichés, take the bull by the horn, drops of water make an ocean, a journey of a thousand miles beginning with one step and so on. Whether you choose to slowly live by those and allow them to unfold, or you decide to take action with exactly what it is you’ve got in your hands, the choice as always remains yours, and the consequences thereafter equally yours to live with…

So, my intellectual, hoping-for-a-better-tomorrow-and-waiting-for-the-government-to-miraculously-turn-a-new-leaf-and-make-a-quick-fix-ambitious-Nigerian-youths… Are you going to Sink or Swim?